Purely sick and tired of my mother. Fully aware that I have written about her in past blog posts. My tone varies from being sad to downright angry about how she’s given up blatantly on herself and everything to be honest. I am the only one in my house who can read in between the lines of not only what she says but more importantly, what she does. I pick up on patterns, habits, everything. I won’t say she doesn’t have a legit issue because she does. Currently awaiting to schedule a surgery for her. I have my mixed emotions about this because for the longest, we thought it was anxiety she was dealing with. That very well could have been part of it. However, I am beyond irritated at how she has had us running in circles and by us, I also mean her doctors too. Countless hospital and doctor visits, testing etc all for it to be an issue with your back?!?! All of this could have been resolved or well on it’s way to being resolved had SHE taken time and effort to understand her fucking symptoms. I feel like my mother was just waiting for an answer to fall from the damn sky and refused to acknowledge that it starts with HER. How do you struggle with something for long and don’t have any fucking idea how to manage it or adequately put your finger on what exactly is going on with you?
I also cannot stand how everyone is victimizing her and further enabling her “woe is me” tendencies. I’m looking at her like did you finally get what the fuck you wanted? You’re on short term disability and don’t need to go to your miserable ass job or lift a finger to do any real work. Congrats mom on successfully being a victim and a sad waste.
I sound very angry and resentful. I am aware. If you put up with half the shit I do in not even being able to enjoy your days off without having to cater to someone constantly, you’d understand.